Beating Imperial Guard

The Cadian 296058th (or whatever) and I are going toe-to-toe in a couple of weeks.
Just a friendly game, but I find playing this guy infuriating.
He loves a Basilisk, a couple of Lemans and a ton of mortars on the support line, meaning even when I get into combat, he has few qualms about bringing indirect fire weapons to bear.

(Played a Ravenwing/Deathwing force against him once, that happened. I won, but I don't have the Deathwing on side this time)

WHAT DO? I'm thinking a lot of deep striking, but I'm also thinking that leaves me terribly exposed for a turn. I'm also thinking go fast and use cover (no duh) but what can Eldar do against such reckless ordnance??

My 1500 list goes like:
Scourges x 5
Reavers x 6
Incubi x 4
Wyches x 9/10
Kabalites x 9/10
Kabalites x 9/10
2 raiders
1 venom

So far the HQ in the list is a succubus and Drazhar, which is 305 points and makes me uneasy. I could as easily take a heavily armed archon and a Talos for that, and bring the talos and the untransported squad of infantry through a web portal? Whaddya think?

I should mention that even though I love winning, I don't want to not be fun.

EDIT: Master of Ordance will also be on the field. He stands at the back and I hate him. I'm going to turn him into a Grotesque if I ever kill him.

The WWP method with the talos seems like it would be more affective and more fun, because trust me i get you with the whole ''having fun without getting hammered'' deal. with Drazhar and that succubus... its too many points in 1500, id leave that for about 2000.

Though honestly... you really need some more raiders bro. I usually never leeave home with 5-6 raiders and I only play for fun. Just what I'm thinkin'.

BUT in terms of tactics with guard? I fight them alot. You need to outnumber him. So attack one flank of his force with your ENTIRE  army. This is a general tactic, but I works with horde armies even more. Get to his weak flank quicksilver and start to systematically take down squads. You'll overwhelm his units each turn. shoot/charge his infantry, get your wyches haywire grenades, and darklight his Tanks into submission. We have unmatched speed, so use it to your advantage when fighting a sluggish army like guard. Always know that YOU are picking all the fights in the game... And make sure you play with your balls to the wall and really go at him hard. All or nothing style to take him down! hahah  hope it helps, buddy.

Thanks, good interesting advice! I'm excited to use the wwp, having a talos just pop out of nowhere should have him laying bricks. I think fun playing should always be rewarded

More raiders is next on the list! About 3/4 of this force is just my old collection from 3rd ed, abandoned because DE didn't really work at all back then.

I'll let you know how it goes!

yep, i feel like too many people get caught up in trying to win... but thats probably because the internet is dominated by the tournament scene, even though most 40k players actually arent like that at all lol

anyway, yeah keep us updated! i love hearing about a good imperial raid.

I get the idea of fun as well.  I love winning but I don't like decimating my opponent either which is why i gave up eldar.  However, that being said, there are a few options I would change.  Deep striking scourges is cool but they will most likely go down first turn they come in which doesn't seem very efficient.  I would bring reavers with blasters or heat lances if I was you for that purpose, they're quick resilient (besides ignores cover) and very efficient points wise.  Also, instead of incubi as I dot think they serve a huge purpose against this style army, brig a raider full of grots instead.  They are the bane of rear armour assaults.  Also, throw some haywire wyches in there instea of all the warriors.  I don't know what you have for models but against imperial guard I would have at least 3x5 man wyches in a venom with haywire, a few 5 man warriors with blasters, grots and reavers for sure.  Throw I some wracks for anti troop (besides the venoms), drop the talos and bring ravagers.  Bring a haemy for a low cost HQ and go to town.  Also, if you have khymera, or models that could proxy as khymera bring a bunch of them (hit at S4) and multi assault his tanks that will be lined up prolly to negate side armour.  That's just me though.  Think you said 1500 points (writing from my crappy iPhone) so you prolly won't get all those in there so just throwing ideas out there.  I just think talos, scourges or incubi aren't worth the points for a fight like this.

^Seconded! Wyches, mate. 3s to hit, 2s to glance. Far more reliable than lances. Can't go wrong! Grots will negate all the S8 AP3 plates that Guard spit out. Once they get furious charge with a Haemy attached, tanks are toast. Big bulked out FA slots with beasts and reavers will tear the infuriating guard a new one. You'll be sweet.

Cheers guys, I can't wait to get my grots and start doing this! You may have gathered I'm doing a bit of "make do" with the models I have (no grots, no ravager...)
These are all great ideas for when I've got the kit though, starting with the grots.

If you dont use ravagers, I like throwing trueborn squads with DL's up in cover. I second reavers with blasters and you can bladevane mortars units with a 3+ jink. I also like to use a Talos up front or on off to one flank on his own as a target he can't ignore while you turbo up the other side. Good Luck take as many slaves as you can, and F Marbo.

I like the idea of the talos on one side. So put the talos on his strong side and the rest of the army on the weak side. Only thing I don't like, is that pretty much means the talos is dead first turn. I have a coven list with 2 in it, grots with Urien, and wracks galore. If only talos started with a pain token. I'm pretty sure they don't, I don't use them much becuz ravagers are so much more cost efficient. I think I will try this, cheers.

Ha, there's almost certainly gonna be a marbo. Fun!