Legacy-Secrets of the Hidden Library - 2nd Annual FIction Competition

Legacy

He never tires of this view. His trophies, his victories, and his memories displayed with all due reverence along the gleaming obsidian walls of his grand hall. At the far end some of his earliest and most favourite victories; the polished skull of a massive Ork chieftain, the horror amp recording of ten thousand death screams unleashed when he loosed the soul ripper virus on a Tau infested backwater, and the heart of a rival Archon perfectly preserved in a bio-organic field. He’d had his Haemonculi devise a way to make it beat at his touch, like it did when he tore it from its previous owner.

That was his first foray into grandiose remembrances. The myriad prideful tokens of his victories became more and more ostentatious, and he cared not for their price. After all what were victories without proper tribute? Flesh puppet mon-keigh space marines in their burnished armour served his every whim. His current favourite party trick was to replace their faces with those of his present guests. The pillars of his hall were inlaid with the last memories of an Eldar craftworld, their soul gems glittered balefully in the amber light. When he ran his hand over them he could taste their anguish, an honour he bestowed the rare few he felt would appreciate the experience. His throne itself was carved from the delicate skulls of the fairest of his craftworld kin. Each so carefully preserved that their lifeless eye sockets evinced the last image they witnessed; his mockingly benevolent smile as he patiently and precisely snuffed out their existence.

None of these trophies however compared with her.

She was his proudest moment. She was the greatest achievement in his epoch spanning existence. She was the prize that, after his trophies lost their lustre, gave him reason to continue an existence he had almost grown bored of. She balanced herself before him so delicately, so dispassionately. He had taught her well, she knew all his accomplishments, all his conquests. She knew everything about him.

He knew she had to try. His limbs had grown unresponsive now, her poison had worked well. Perhaps she would succeed where so many others had failed. The toxin had immobilised him almost instantly, an altogether not unpleasant feeling as the pain was exquisite. She had learned well. Tantalizingly out of reach she danced, but close enough that he could smell her musk; floral notes mixed with leather, steel and blood. His favourite. He found he could still make a diminutive susurration; not enough to call for his thralls but enough to whisper a single, almost inaudible word.

She leaned in close, had he spoke? Was it condemnation? Perhaps praise? Her expanding grin began to show a hint of victory, and his heart fell. She had failed him. As he breathed out the noxious vapours and watched her perfect form convulse on the floor he realized all the trophies of a thousand lifetimes paled with this.

She was his greatest failure.

Did the toxins on his breath kill her?

Cakeaunoob wrote:

Did the toxins on his breath kill her?

Not sure how to answer, I would think that the implication was there? Perhaps the concept of a last deadly gasp was too elusive?

Quote :

She balanced herself before him so delicately, so dispassionately. He had taught her well, she knew all his accomplishments, all his conquests. She knew everything about him.

I think it's hinted at here: but in reacting, she had not been dispassionate, she had in fact given in at the last and showed him her imperfection. Thus, he failed to make her so.

I could be wrong. Anyway, I love the subtlety of this, and the perfect snapshot of Dark Eldar behaviour!

I always like to leave interpretation to the reader; I find most great stories ring true on some personal level, could be her lack of dispassion. Could also be her own pride; wanting that last bit of acknowledgement from an authority figure. Sometimes a mirror can be unkindm

Wow I love this one. You really managed to cram a whole narrative into that little space. Props!

ArmchairOrrery wrote:

Wow I love this one. You really managed to cram a whole narrative into that little space. Props!

cheers mate!

You won 1st and already got some info on what the judges said, so I'll just repeat - brilliant work here!

Thor665 wrote:

You won 1st and already got some info on what the judges said, so I'll just repeat - brilliant work here!

thank you again, I have another piece in the works......

You ready have an interested reader then